This past weekend found us heading up north to the Bay Area once again with the goal of laughing until it hurt. On Friday night, we found our way onto an awful United flight that was bound for San Francisco. [PSA: Don’t fly United basic economy—it’s worse than Spirit]. Checking in late caused us both to get middle seats in the back of the plane. Upon landing, we got in an Uber that was being driven by a guy who was jamming out to Elton John’s “Can You Feel the Love Tonight...” He was really going for it with his vocal inflections and it was difficult for Grant and me not to snicker. Laughing at an Uber driver was probably a good indication that the trip was going to be laughable.
Our first stop was to Tony’s in North Beach, which has the best pizzas I have probably ever had. They know it’s good too as they charge people $30+ for a normal size pizza. We even had to get it to go as it was impossible to get a table before they closed with wait times exceeding their business hours. We chowed down at Kate’s before turning in for the night.
Grant slept until 10:30 am. I want to make sure I document that because he always claims to not be able to sleep past 9:00 am, but he definitely did! Haha. I got bored waiting for him so I took off to explore the streets on my own. We eventually met up and had a burger before heading down to the “capital” according to Jonathan Van Ness (Queer Eye guy) during his not-so-funny segment.
The main allure of this trip was to go to Clusterfest. Sponsored by Comedy Central, this three-day festival housed some of the biggest names in comedy scheduled sporadically throughout the day. The venue was pretty spectacular as it was smooshed in the middle of a park that was between SF’s city hall, civic auditorium, and their museums.
What became quite clear was that Grant and I got there really early. Having not learned from past festivals, just because the venue is open doesn’t mean anything is going on. We quickly made a b-line to the Crank Yankers installation. The show is coming back in the fall, which we are extremely excited about.
The festival implemented a new reservation ticket system for some of the smaller venues. Instead of waiting in the standby line, you would “reserve your spot” and wait in a far smaller line that guaranteed entry. The only problem was that as soon as the reservations were released (on the hour) they would instantly sell-out. The only tickets that would be available were VIP tickets, but those were issued to individuals who spent a fortune on their tickets.
There were 4 stages spread out through the venue with some you could just walk in. Most of the walk-in were duds so we eventually waited in one of the long lines and made it in. The show was hilarious — Jonathan Veiht— and it really served as a turning point for the festival. Here's a video of one that we loved. that he has done previously
The next reservation came available and like the previous 3 attempts—it sold out beside the VIP. Frustrated, I signed up for the VIP tickets and for whatever reason it gave me passes. It did warn that a “VIP” bracket would be checked, but based upon how lacks security had been we felt that we could "chance it." We were successful! We got into the next show and watched as comic after comic did their own version of stand-up.
After about the third show, our friend Levent showed up with this girlfriend. They were in the main room that was housing John Mulaney who is my favorite comic right now. The stadium was packed and they were in the middle standing room section. The show let out and I rushed to find actual seats. Again, nothing was available in the general admission side, but there was plenty in the VIP section. I casually went under the rope divider and secured us left orchestra seats about 7 rows back from the stage. The only catch was that we were not the only ones who had the same idea.
Security came lurking around and caught everyone around us who had the same idea. However, after coaching Grant to avoid eye contact with the security guards we were good. The opening acts were hilarious and John Mulaney’s set did not disappoint. Afterward, we ran over to the “Colossal Stage” where the next large act of the night, Leslie Jones from SNL was to perform.
Having done it all day, I casually walked again to the VIP section, which had availability center orchestra about 5 rows back again. Again, we had no problem and were able to have a seat in a mostly standing room only type of venue. The show was great and we accomplished our main goal, which was to laugh until it hurt.
The rest of the trip had us hanging out with Kate. We visited Fisherman’s Wharf and the Jack London Square in Oakland. Hoped on a Southwest flight on the way back and made it home ready for another day at work.