Getting a large group of friends together is always a challenge. Getting everyone to get along is nearly impossible. Holly pulled off the impossible by not only getting everyone to get along but also having a swell time. This trip found us going to Nashville with friends we had met before and some new friends we were excited to meet.
My mom took Ripley to Houston, leaving Grant and me free to live it up in the Volunteer State, Tennessee. We flew Southwest direct to Nashville; it was delayed about an hour, but nothing too major. We rented a car and drove to the two four-bedroom, side-by-side townhomes close to downtown. When we arrived, we were greeted with friends and Hattie B’s fried chicken. You can’t beat that welcome.
Everyone made their way to the rooftop to play games, so after inhaling the food, we joined them. It was a long day and flight, so after a few rounds, we all called it a night. The room that we were staying in had what seemed to be custom-built bunk beds three high. This seemed easy compared to other rooms with two sets of three bunkbeds or six beds in one room. I could only imagine how chaotic the bathroom use would be for that room.
The following day, we woke up early to go tubing. The drive up was nothing but farmland, and thanks to Latisha and Seth, we knew we were looking at corn, soybean, and tobacco. We drove almost to Kentucky before turning off to meet a guy who was helping us with the tubes. What was initially thought to be a 2-hour tubing experience turned into a 3.5-hour tubing experience due to the water being low. Besides the slight annoyance of standing up and moving when the water got shallow, it was gorgeous. There wasn’t another soul on the water beside us, which never happens. The only negative was that I agreed to a virtual meeting at 11 am San Diego time. It would have been fine if the river had been 2 hours, but with the extra time, I would have had to take the meeting on the river. So, as everyone was comfortably relaxing, I was the dummy pulling out my cell phone, logging in, and typing random messages in the chat to prove attendance while on the river. Thankfully, I didn’t drop my phone, I got credit, and no one knew I was not in attendance.
After the tubing, we ate at a BBQ place called Mission BBQ. The food was excellent, and I enjoyed the jalapeño and cheese sausage. I am craving it now as I type this on the airplane. Afterward, we went home to get cleaned up for our night activities. Holly had found a restaurant in the “Gulch.” Grant and others found it hilarious to keep asking Holly where it was, and she would be happy to repeat herself a million times and say the “Gulch.” She was such a good sport, and so accommodating the entire trip.
That evening, Holly made reservations at Proof at the W Hotel. It had a gorgeous view of downtown, but the food was so-so. The staff weren’t that helpful, and I was not too fond of the food. Instead of eating, Grant, Louis, and I left early and made two stops for additional food. First to the Gumbo Bros, and then to the Iberian Pig. Not a shock, we ate gumbo at Gumbo Bros. Grant made fun of me because I told the waiter that we weren’t eating very much because we planned on going somewhere else to eat. We all laughed, and Grant made fun of me for oversharing, but the food came out fast, so I guess “oversharing worked.” Next up was the Iberian Pig. This place served tapas and other small bites, so I thought it would make a good stop. The place was packed, but we talked to the hostess, and they found us a table in five minutes. Once at the table, I “overshared” again with the waitress, who hooked us up with our food lightning fast. Tennessee is slow, so I don’t think they were used to our— “Hey, we have a show in 20 minutes, and we just want to eat our food as quickly as it comes out” mentality. It seemed like this was a place where people spent hours. Not us.
Grant was a bit impatient and worried that he would miss his precious drag show, but I promised him that we would make it, and we made it. He wanted to go because the most recent winner of RuPaul’s Drag Race was going to be there, Nimphia Wynn. We arrived at Play, and this place was way over-capacity. We found that to be true with almost any bar in Nashville. The Fire Marshall must be senile or made handsomely under the table. We bumped and pushed our way to a reasonable spot and then parked it for a bit. One act after another came out with little to no downtime. The problem was that the whole act was a drag queen coming on stage, moving her lips for a bit, and then grabbing money. The song would end, and the DJ would rewind it halfway so that way people could continue to tip. They didn’t do anything to deserve this besides walk on a stage. And people were insane, giving them $20s for this. Finally, the Nimphia came on stage and the audience went ballistic. She did the same thing as all the other queens: she went through two Adele songs, and people were still trying to give her money. She asked the DJ to play another Adele song just so that way she could continue to grab cash and have music playing. You know it’s terrible when Grant asks, “You ready to go?”
Never one to turn down an opportunity to leave a drag show early, we departed early and checked out some of the tourist sites. The first stop was a full-scale replica of the Parthenon in Greece. It's random to have in Nashville, but interesting to stop and snap a photo of. Louis had yet to see Broadway Street, so we drove to the bars to see the excitement. Somehow, Grant found a free parking spot one block away, so instead of driving by, we hopped out. Chaos. I am sure there is a study, but there must be four women for every man in that city. You could look right, left, up, or down, and anyway you looked, there was either a crown, cowboy hat, or sash that said: “bride to be.” It is such a fun and lively atmosphere where everyone seems to be having a great time. I am sure the booze that appears more plentiful than water doesn’t hurt. Being lame, we called it a night while the rest of the crew continued to party the night away.
Saturday morning was all about Pinewood Social. A restaurant, bar, bakery, bowling alley, pool…if you named it, they probably had it. After eating and swimming, we darted with Louis to check out the Grand Old Opry, Opry Mills Mall, and the Gaylord Nashville. Somehow, we squeezed all of that in with the bit of time we had and saw everything. It was an abbreviated version and extremely hot, but it’s something we can check off the “things to do in Nashville” list.
We were rushed because Holly organized a private tour on a tractor. The tractor pulled a semi-enclosed pallet with a DJ, hype man, bar, and us. Throughout the downtown tour, the DJ played music, the hype man would try to get us to dance, the booze was flowing, and we were both drinking and dancing away throughout downtown Nashville. It was a fun experience, and everyone seemed to have a great time!
Unfortunately, there was a disconnect, which I blame myself for that followed. An early dinner was next, and we went to “The Stillery.” Grant put in “Nashville Stillery” and I thought it was the wrong place. I re-routed us to “The Stillery,” which was not the correct place. I felt terrible. I may have thought people were confused and couldn’t find their way to the second floor. Little did I know— I was the one confused. After eating, we left and went to our evening show at the Woolworth Theater called Shiner's Nashville.
The show was billed as a combination of comedy and cirque and did not disappoint. There was comedy, burlesque, acrobats, and singing. They tried to throw everything they possibly could into this show. While Grant was intrigued by the show, I was intrigued by the drama happening in the show's audience— drunk trash versus Karen x 2. Karen yelled at drunk trash, drunk trash yelled back, Karen went to complain to the manager, drunk trash went to “diffuse Karen,”… it was getting good. Unfortunately, like all good things, it ended too soon, and no one was kicked out— ending the drama in a tie.
After the show, we met up with the group for a raucous evening at Kid Rock’s Big Ass Honky Tonk Rock and Roll Steakhouse downtown. Grant and I were a bit worried that they would play country music we had never heard of, but when we got there, they were rapping Eminem. We stayed for a good while and had a lot of fun. Some of the people in our group were able to snag a table, so we actually went to sit and enjoy the musicians. What was crazy to me was that people were paying top dollar— $500— for the band to play songs. You could potentially see the actual artist who originated the song for cheaper than that! People are just highly generous, I guess, when it comes to that stuff in Nashville, and I am sure the artists appreciate it. We left, and the crew continued to drink and party for the rest of the night. Kudos to them because they partied, woke up in the morning, and still looked less exhausted than me.
Sunday morning was a blur and included packing, cleaning up, and getting ready for the airport. Before we left, Holly had planned one final brunch at LA Jackson on the rooftop of the Hyatt. This place had a killer view and fantastic food. She also pre-ordered a charcuterie board and a huge drink fit to serve 12 people. Grant and I ordered the fried croissant and some biscuits and gravy. You can’t leave the South without eating enough unhealthy food that you almost have a coronary. We parted ways, said goodbye to friends, dropped off the rental car, and went to the airport.
The trip was a blast, and Holly did a fantastic job planning and executing a memorable 40th birthday party. She may be turning 40, but she sure as shit put many 21-year-olds to shame with her partying! Here’s to another 40 years of health, good fortune, and friendship.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY HOLLY